Saturday, February 24, 2018

Personal blogging

First off, look at these awesome shoes I got in Venice! 

I was gone for 2 weeks, in various cities in Italy. Honestly don't recall taking a vacation for so long. I felt like my old self again and not just a wage slave (which is kind of the point of a vacation). What is different about this time is that when I came back--I don't know if it's the crappy weather or SAD or what--I realized that I've kind of neglected my true passion: writing. Not sure how to follow the logic on that one lol.

I never stopped writing and I'm pretty much done with a novel and I've got short stories and a million other half-finished things, but nothing finished. Nothing good enough to shop around. And that's sad and kind of pathetic. I work in book publishing, and I realized that while I've been helping authors with their books, I've neglected mine. Obviously, I need to eat and I can't just quit my job to write, but I decided in the last two weeks that I'm going to make it work somehow. I joined a critique group and committed to finish a short story whether or not it killed me. If I can't finish a short story--get it to the point it's submission-worthy, then that's really sad. This short story would be in my admissions portfolio for a writer's retreat I'm interested in. 

And then I got a freelance job--an "offer I couldn't refuse." I wonder if it's easier in other cities, but in NYC basically everyone's got side jobs. It's an expensive city. So I had to put my writing aside for 3 weeks while I worked (in addition to my day job, which often goes overtime). How sad. Right when I was determined to go 100%, I had this come up and had to put my writing on hold yet again. I couldn't write, but I could trim away the extra stuff I was wasting my time on--video games, social media, real-life friends (sadly). That's why I vanished for a month.

I considered starting an author blog--if you are serious about being an author, you should have some sort of online presence. Networking is important for you too. Right now, I'm a strange outlier--I'm established in the publishing industry but a nobody in writing circles. In writing circles, my writing is overlooked by my publishing background...there's only so many times I can dodge the question, "So what do you doooo?" Not to make it all about me, but I'd like to talk about my writing, not my day job.

So I was about to shut this blog down and start my writing blog anyway--I'd probably have enough time to run both, but I'm just trying to focus my life here. No more Facebook, Instagram either. That would have been good-bye. But I decided against it, because the only thing more pathetic than not writing is writing a post about why you aren't writing. Also I should be writing right now, lol, instead of this post. When I have a reason to have an online presence--when I'm actually published or if I get accepted to that writer's retreat, then I'll start the writer's blog and maybe say good-bye to this one. Before my New Year, New Me decision, I'd been toying with the idea of taking this blog to YouTube, but video is a time-suck that'll probably kill any chances of having a writing career at all.

Ah, beautiful Venice
Dark fashion's a part of me as much as writing, so I don't think I can ever say good-bye (I've got a post scheduled for the regular day, Thursday). I think even if I'm a successful author, there will still be opinions on trends and how I hate coffin bags. I'm doubtful I'll update weekly as I've had done consistently for the last few years, and I'll probably not be as active as I used to be.


  1. I really love your blog, and I wish you well in refocusing on writing. If you can update this a few times a year I'll still be happy! <3

  2. I hope you don't abandon this blog, it has always been one of my favourites!! I'm glad you got to take a nice vacation and are working towards your goals!!

  3. Wow, those shoes are pretty impressive. Now I'm sad that the only thing I got from Venice was a cold and an overpriced sketchbook.

    I really, really hope you won't abandon or delete this blog - after all, any kind of writing is a valuable exercise and creates opportunity for improvement. Although I know how hard is to manage different responsibilities, time-wise.
    And I love your witty, a bit sarcastic way of writing about the alternative fashion. Or just fashion in general, high-end or mainstream, you make it all super interesting.

  4. These harlequin shoes, holy cow. I can see them in many fantasy-goth inspired outfits. They are so quirky, I can't <3
    You see, I don't feel like writing should be an obligation. Maybe it's just my way of managing tasks (or lack thereof), but I feel it's valuable to keep many options open. You feel like writing 5 paragraphs of a novel? Go for it. You feel it's the right time to brag about coffin bags or roast Killstar's clothing? So be it. I just don't see a point in cutting everything off in order to finish one thing. Because when something is forced it WILL look forced to potential readers. You gotta take breaks to enjoy your everyday garbage.
    Also, as above - snarky writing is my kind of thing. As a non-native English speaker I learn a lot this way >D

  5. I hear ya, balancing the things you want to do with the things you need to do is a grand undertaking. I really hope you find that balance in a way that doesn't have too many obstacles lol.
    I find the networking aspect of meeting goals to be particularly troubling, though I don't know anything about engaging a crowd, so. I get the feeling you won't have that problem, heh, your blog being the example I can use-- your content is so natural to a level of discourse I could have with a good friend?

    I agree with Ra, though-- forcing yourself to do a particular something sucks the joy out of it. Something I really hope to avoid by making things to sell but not making one specific thing over more than two maybe three times.
    Anyway, I hope you keep the blog... I admit I'd feel like the blogging world would be less appealing than it already is without your blog.

  6. It's so hard to prioritize in life :/ I love reading books, but I are working on a book myself since a few years back. I always choose to read instead though so I feel like I will never finish it. I don't know how authors do it! Goddammit I love reading too much, haha!
    I hope you will find time to write :)

    1. Just have a word count goal per day and work towards that! maybe 500 words a day to start...a huge book can be overwhelming but breaking it up in small manageable chunks is how the authors do it!

    2. I should really try that! Maybe if I write some sentences every day I will get more and more inspired :D